Tuesday, March 19, 2013

What Next?

Since SPM & STPM results are just about to be released, adrenaline must be running high and many are probably at the edge of their seats wondering what could that slip of paper hold or some are just dreading the day it comes out. Getting good results a one thing, what to do next is another. So what if one gets good results, it doesn't guarantee that you will get to the path that you desire. I've heard of countless of stories where excellent students get courses far from their desired choices. In those days, only 4 flat students get into courses such as medicine or dentistry in public universities. And I think that is ridiculous as think academics should not be judged by results only, but the overall performance of the student. However, now with the myriad of choices, there are other ways to get into top grossing courses with the many private universities sprouting up across the country. But if you don't have a big piggy bank back home, those won't be the options that you would be heading for just yet.

Our fate unfortunately lies in the hands of authorities and we are at the mercy of it. I was one of those who fell victim to that. I was one of those who took the less traveled path of STPM, many people warned me that it is one of the hardest exam in the WORLD. Unfortunately, my results was not too bad but not ideal in the case if i wanted to pursue medicine or dentistry. Which was really bad in my case since its been my dream to be a dentist. But by the grace of God, I'm now studying in my 3rd year of dentistry in a public university-that would be a long story to share but maybe I could share it one day. During my years in university, I've heard numerous of stories of 4 flat students failing to get in to medicine or dentistry and people who get less than ideal results who give up their dreams of being a doctor or dentist and I find that very sad. Hence, I'm sharing this in order that less people will fall into that trap and settle for something less than their dreams or ambitions.

Thank God when it was time for me to enter university, there was a slight shift in the university scene. Universiti Sains Malaysia(USM) was annouced as the first ever APEX university in Malaysia. This gives USM an autonomy to choose their students which then would then be the crème de la crème. But in saying that, they changed their system so that they would not only assess a person by their academics alone but as a whole. Thus, students who don't have the most excellent results are still given a shot at pursuing their dreams. The great thing about USM is that they would usually give you the course of your choice because they understand that work without passion is useless. What is the point of doing what you do if you don't have the interest or passion in it. Nonetheless, I'm aware that there are alot of people who study what they're studying just for the sake of getting a degree and moving on in life. 

Hence, students who score less than the ideal 4 flat actually have a chance of applying for medical, dentsitry and even health science courses such as biomedicine, dietetics, forensics etc. In USM, the minimum CGPA to qualify to apply for these courses are 3.50 and above, a blessing to those who failed to achieve perfect scores in all papers. USM not only takes into account your results but also your extra-curricular activities and also your performance in the interview which you have to go through in order to enter. So, this really depends on how bad you want it and how you impress and convince the panel with your charisma. Yes, there is still hope. Not only that, for the less brave-hearted who dare not attempt the dreaded STPM, do not fear because USM also actually accepts student's from A-levels. Therefore, I hope that those who have a dream will continue to pursue it and not lose hope even when there seems as if there is no hope.


Monday, March 18, 2013

Failed

For too long there has been a battle waging inside of me, a duel of the inner-man(or in this case, inner-lady). Thoughts have been swirling inside my head in a whirl-wind, crescendoing to the peak. I've been silent and dormant far too long, that i think i've lost my voice in the midst of it all. Most of the time i'm caught up with what the public would perceive me, posting things up would mean that every single thing would be scrutinized by everyone. A part of me also wants to keep the mystery and go against the tide of a myriad of bloggers out there who have a far more appealing and vivacious vocabulary that comes to them effortlessly than i. What is mine compared to them? Why would anyone give a cent to what i have to think or say. Many times, i started off with a post and then halfway through i just leave it there thinking it would not be worth to post it. Yes, I failed again in keeping my promise to blog again. It's not an excuse but just shows ho human I am.

On the other hand, posting things up would mean being open & vulnerable about my life, and letting people see who i really am. It takes real courage to let people see who you really are. I'm not sure whether i'm brave enough. It scares me cause i'm afraid ppl might not like who i am. Besides that, I didn't wanna fall into the trap of blogging for the attention. Sometimes, I found myself posting in order to get more ppl to read and i wanted to know if there were ppl who read it. Like they say, blogging can become an addiction that creeps up and takes over your life bit by bit, it can also apply to facebooking as well.

 For sometime I stopped blogging because i didn't want what I write to not be a reflection of what i am inside, I didn't wanna be a hyprocrite. Sometimes, the things ppl blog about make others thk that their life is a bed of roses and that everything is perfect. I don't wanna sound like that or that I'm anywhere close to being perfect. That is why there was a point of time that even when everything was good & up, I didn't wanna blog about it either 'cuz it might sound like boasting or being to good to be true .Nonetheless, "As for me, may I never boast about anything except the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ." Galations 6:14
Other times, i'm just at a loss of what to write and i just don't know how or where to start.Some people may think that i think too much. Yups, maybe i do. But I don't want to post mindlessly about things. Nevertheless just as the lyrics of the song by pink goes... i'm gonna try & try again.



Saturday, March 16, 2013

DEATH

DEATH. How do you explain death?

Even before this, I had already planned to write a post about death. But recent events have spurred me to write about it even more. From the death of a barely 2 years old child, to the death of a 52 year old woman a victim of a robbery, to the death of numerous people due to an unexpected bomb that exploded at the end of a marathon. No one knows why they were taken away.
Death happens all around us, death occurs every second every day all around the world. But we don't even bother to stop and mourn or be sad over the loss of a life until it affects us directly. I guess some of us just close an eye, refusing to care cuz' if they do, they would have to face the reality that they themselves would eventually have to face death one day.

Even the bible states that it is 
"Better to spend your time at funerals than at parties.
    After all, everyone dies—
    so the living should take this to heart.
Sorrow is better than laughter,
    for sadness has a refining influence on us.
A wise person thinks a lot about death,
    while a fool thinks only about having a good time."
-Ecclesiastes 7:2-4-

Do we really know where we will go after death? Because the consequence of sin is death, hence all of us are doomed to the eternal fire of hell. But because God loves us so much that He sent His only son to die on the cross for our sins that we may be able to be saved.

You may wonder how could a loving God create such a terrible place as hell. Let's put it this way, say a robber killed your brother, and was sent for trial in the courts. But because God is such a loving God that He let the robber free cuz' He's such a loving God. Would that be fair? How would you feel? Therefore, because although He is a loving God, He is also a Just God, He can't condone sin. But because He loves us so much, that He sent His son Jesus Christ to come as a human to live a sinless & blameless life so that He can take our place, so that we may be saved and receive eternal life.

Would you accept Him into your life today?

Monday, February 6, 2012

Remind me

It's so easy to get lost in the thorns of life and lose our way.. I'm surprised at how easy it is to forget and take for granted everything He has blessed us with.

I was reminded once again of this poem that i wrote some time ago cuz' i knew i would forget...



Lord, I'm praying this for the future,

When times are dry and I'm far from You,

When all around me is darkness and pain,

When all I wanna do is to just give up,

Remind me of who You are Lord,

Remind me again of Your great love for me,

Remind me again and again that You are there...


Lord, I pray that You will hear my cries,

Through the troubled times and even the good times,

Your hand guided me through,

Through the ups and downs of life,

Remind me of Your Majesty,

Remind me again of Your Faithfulness,

Remind me again and again of who You are....


Remind me again Lord, for I am forgetful....

Sunday, September 4, 2011

New Beginning

So, after such a long time, i finally summoned the courage to share what really happened the past few years of my life and maybe at the same time bless those who read it. I have never really gone into details about my journey coming to USM, changing course and all because at that time I didn't want people to see me in such a vulnerable, weak and helpless state.

Then recently, one of my close friends brought up this subject to me, and it was something that i had been contemplating on. Just as i was questioning whether i should or not, i came across this verse that i had stumbled upon a few days ago which did not mean much at that time. But reading it again brought a whole new meaning to me.

Psalm 40
5 Many, LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us.
None can compare with you;
were I to speak and tell of your deeds,
they would be too many to declare.

6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire—
but my ears you have opened[c]
burnt offerings and sin offerings[d] you did not require.
7 Then I said, “Here I am, I have come—
it is written about me in the scroll.[e]
8 I desire to do your will, my God;
your law is within my heart.”

9 I proclaim your saving acts in the great assembly;
I do not seal my lips, LORD,
as you know.
10 I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
I speak of your faithfulness and your saving help.
I do not conceal your love and your faithfulness
from the great assembly.

11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, LORD;
may your love and faithfulness always protect me.
12 For troubles without number surround me;
my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
and my heart fails within me.
13 Be pleased to save me, LORD;
come quickly, LORD, to help me.

Hence, i decided to share a little bit of my experiences and the feeling that i felt during that period of time. Nonetheless, i must warn that one should always read with discernment because what may have worked out for me may not happen the same way for everyone. That is why we must be careful not to put God in a box and limit the way He may work.